Day 1 & 2 (April 9th & 10th)

We really feel that we have been blessed with a very very special baby.

Ben has slept, fed, and pooped really well :).  Seems like a weird thing to say, but we had no idea how this was going to work since we were told that he enjoyed party-ing all night, and slept during the day.  So far it seems to be the opposite.



It was wonderful to have Sheldon's brother Blaine here as well.  We had to say our goodbyes today, as we rode with him on the train to the airport.  Thanks for making the little detour to spend some time with us Blaine.  We all loved having you here!  Eli loved riding on the train today.

  

  

Yesterday (Saturday), Eli, Blaine and Sheldon went to a Florida Panthers game.  We had a great time, and it gave Hilary some alone time with Ben.  The Panther's game was fun, and we had a blast, eating popcorn, chatting, and ultimately watching a Florida Panther's win.



We also went to a swap shop.  Hilary and I thought it looked very similar to something that we would have seen in Ethiopia.  Obviously not as many people, but still a crazy crazy market to be a part of.  Just about everything you've ever needed is in that market.  Usually not very good quality, but it still has it's benefit.

Today Ben had his moments of frustration with us, but as we type this at 8:30 pm, he is peacefully sleeping in his bed.  We are learning what positions he likes, and what things just make him mad.  Funny how such a little guy, can command so much of us :)

We are still waiting for one piece of paperwork to get home, and we hope to see this by Monday or Tuesday.  We have booked our flights back to Minneapolis for Tuesday night (arriving early early Wednesday morning), and then we are hoping to be able to get into Winnipeg on Wednesday evening.  Please pray for quick document processing, and safe travels all the way home.

And a little teaser for seeing this brotherly love for realz!

Introducing Benjamin Jeremy Dueck

We would like you all to meet our new son, Benjamin Jeremy.  He was born on March 23rd, and has stolen all of our hearts already.

In what has been a very busy and stressful week, we were able to leave Winnipeg on Thursday around noon, and arrive at our hotel in the wee morning of Friday, April 8th.  We met up with my brother, Blaine, who had coincidentally been in Florida for a conference.  We all tried to sleep, although not well, and were ready and itching to get to the adoption agency for our 11:30 meeting.  We had some meetings, met lots of wonderful people and had to sign lots of paperwork, but around 4:00 pm local time, we were leaving with Benjamin in our arms.


We went out for a celebratory meal (we were all famished from a long day without lunch), and returned to the hotel.  We will have more to post later, but here's the main gist of the day :)

The trip that didn't quite go as planned...

We're back.  Remember us?

We wish this post was of a more positive variety, but sadly, our adoption plans for the end of January fell through at the last minute.  The birth mother changed her mind at the very last minute, and we did not become a family of 4.

We thank everyone for their prayers and support as we traveled to Florida, and then had our hearts broken, and traveled back home.  As we've dealt with the aftermath of this trip, we received quite a few questions about the process.  

Why haven't we shared this publicly on Facebook, and this blog, like we did with Elijah's story.
In Elijah's story, it was easier to share the story since he was already born, and by the time we found about him, there were not a lot of things that were up for discussion.  Elijah was already born (he was 1.5 or so when we got the referral), and it was basically up to the judge to make a declaration that he was our son (or not).  In this scenario we were are not supposed to share about the details of the "referral.".  Obviously there were a few people who were aware of it, and when we began travelling to Florida, it was pretty obvious why we were doing so.

Why did we travel to Florida before the baby was born?
First of all, for those who are considering Florida as an adoption option, please know that it is totally not recommended that we travel.  The province is not in favor of it, and the agency here is opposed to travel.  So then, why would we have gone?  Long story short, the birth mother expressed that she would like us down there.  We made the decision to travel against agency recommendations.  Of course, we all know now that this trip ended up not being a fruitful trip, however, we have also been asked whether we regret making this trip.  We do not.  If we had not traveled, we would have always wondered whether us not travelling was the reason she made the decision that she did.  We will always know that we made our best attempt at adopting this child.  Ultimately it failed, but we did everything we could.  Another reason we do not regret this trip is because we were able to meet our agency representatives down in Florida.  What delightful people they are.  We had great chats with them, and we see that they really do care.  We also were able to have very frank discussions about the process, and where we go from here.  Awesome connections we were able to make there.  Also, we had a great time having Melissa all to ourselves.  We didn't have Blaine or the kids to distract her, we got to spend good quality time with our sister in law (Blaine, we love you and the kids as well, we hope you understand :) ).

Why DID she change her mind?
We do not know the reasons for her to change her, but she has that option.  The baby is her baby, not ours until she signs consent which she can only sign after 48 hours.  We wish that she would have made the other decision, but we understand that this is the process, and it is her decision.

Where do we go from here?
We will re-enter the process, and hopefully we won't have to wait too long for a referral/match.  We have a new appreciation for the process, and we have a few tasks to complete before we get another match.  We learned that we have an awesome support system in place.  The phone calls, texts, emails, and FB messages we received provided us with some much needed support while we were stuck there all alone.  We learned just how bad the US/Cdn rate is, and how expensive everything is in Florida during "the season".  We know how much we dislike the Miami airport and getting to it :).

What positives did we take from this trip?
We had a great time at Sea World.  We really enjoyed our hotel.  It was great to meet up with some church friends in Orlando.  Here are some pictures of our trip.

Enjoying supper at the Texas Roadhouse on the way down.

Eli enjoyed the flight, but luckily he did get some sleep.

Melissa was a godsend... Cooking, washing dishes....

...Reading and playing with Eli.

Eli and Hilary enjoyed swimming at our hotel.....

.... a lot.  I think they averaged almost twice a day.

We were lucky to meet up with some church friends before heading off to Sea World.
Thank you guys for everything in Orlando!

SeaWorld!!!

On the way in.  We weren't grumpy yet :)

Eli enjoyed the animals....

... but really enjoyed all the rides.

Especially the train!

We need to work on his smiling (for pictures), but we needed a pose in front of the killer whales.

Even Sheldon went on a ride or two.  Only the kiddo rides though.

These 3 were still smiling at the end of the SeaWorld trip.

Eli was fascinated with the emergency instructions on the plane.
Lots of questions about why and how people would maneuver on the water.

We were incredibly blessed by friends and family who left some encouragement
when we returned home.

Thank you for all the prayers and support from all over.  We felt the support and still feel the support as we begin to process what happened.  We have returned back to our regular routine.  We can't wait to share any news that receive and are allowed to share, with all of you.